During our evening with Peter Walsh, there were times when he asked the audience was able to ask questions. In the mainly female audience, the question was asked a few times,
“My husband is the one that leaves his stuff all over the place. What can I do about that?”
Each time, after the question was asked, there would be a laugh from the audience and I could see heads nodding up and down. I was curious as to how Peter was going to respond to that question. In my career, I too have been faced with situations similar to the question being asked. Peter responded quite simply,
“if you just focus on the stuff, it’s not going to happen. It will become, very quickly, about who is going to win the argument.”
“Your tools are all over the place.”
“You have too many shoes.”
“Oh ya, well you never hang up your jacket”
“You buy too many clothes.”
And so it goes on…
The truth is, it shouldn’t be about the ‘stuff’. It’s time to shift your thinking. Go back to the 4 key points that Peter Walsh lives by:
- What is the vision you have for your space?
- What is the function of that space?
- Does your space require any zones?
- Do you know your limits to your zones?
Start that conversation now! In most cases, your spouse and/or significant other wants what is best for you. They are not mind readers and shouldn’t be expected to be. The true power is when you realize that
you get to create the life you are living.
When it comes to you and your spouse/significant other having different expectations with children, there are two points to consider:
- children like to have limits
- children like to have routines
You look at any school or organized program that your children have been involved in. Speaking from my past life as a teacher, we had classroom rules and routines. The kids did not balk at any of them. If the recess bell went, the expectation was that any mess would be cleaned up before they went outside. No one threw a temper tantrum, no one stomped away. It was expected and it was done. Period.
Let’s take this now to your home. If the vision for your master bedroom is to have no kids toys laying around, then there are 2 possible scenarios:
Limit: There will be no kids toys in our Master Bedroom (plain and simple) OR
Routines: When we leave the Master Bedroom (or before bedtime), all of the toys in our bedroom must be taken out and put away.
It really is that simple.
When one lady in the audience said, “My kids just have so many toys they can’t live without,” I laughed the biggest belly laugh when Peter responded,
“Shut up!”
While Peter was being a bit cheeky, he was also being very honest! Here is what Peter shared on this exact thought:
- it is important to teach your kids limits.
- it is important to teach your kids about having zones.
- get your kids involved in the charity aspect (giving toys away).
- create experiences for your children instead of just giving a gift.
It all comes back, full circle, to this:
Why do people tend to hold on to these type of articles? Peter Walsh suggests that by letting go of the items, people may feel that they will loose the memory. Just stop and think about that for a minute. If you got rid of that old t-shirt that you bought when you saw Duran Duran (and yes – this is now aging me), would you loose the memory of that concert? Most likely not. My mom, not too long ago, finally was able to get rid of my dad’s Maui 86 t-shirt (and yes – that was 1986!).
Turn all of your hangers around so they are facing backwards.
The passport officer who was working with me actually laughed and said that most people do. Little did she know what I do for a living (insert chuckle here).
