Last week I had the opportunity to attend a one-day seminar titled, ‘The Power of Perspective’. There were two main reasons why I attended the seminar:
- My own Business Coach, Elizabeth Critchley , was the facilitator so I knew it was going to be filled with content and information that I would be able to use.
- I wanted to get more tools in my preverbal ‘toolbox’ to help clients with perspective.
At the beginning of the seminar we quickly had the chance to introduce ourselves and tell everyone what we were hoping to get out of the day. When it came to my turn I stated that I wanted to learn more about perspective to help my clients.
Why would I need some more tools in my toolbox? Well, I consider myself a lifelong learner so why wouldn’t I be open to new techniques that could only benefit my business and in turn, my clients? In every service we provide, there is always a perspective to think about:
- Getting ready to sell your home – the perspective of ‘my home’ vs ‘ a home (a product)’.
- Setting up a new home – the shift of perspective of ‘old’ vs ‘new’.
- De-cluttering – the shift of perspective of “holding on’ vs ‘moving on’.
- Downsizing – the shift of perspective of ‘hanging on‘ to ‘new beginnings’.
By being able to make a small change – a tweak in perspective – BIG changes can happen. Roadblocks can be taken down, weight can be lifted. It can be a very powerful thing!
I’d like to share a personal perspective change for me that has been a total game-changer for me.
If you follow my blog you will know that I love a clean house but I actually don’t like cleaning my house. I typically get frustrated at the rest of my family when they leave all their crap around (and yes – in my mind – it’s crap). If you leave stuff just lying around the house, it’s known as crap. Anyway, I used to get angry. Angry that I was the only one cleaning the house when clearly everyone was responsible for making the mess. I would get angry when my hubby would say things like,
“I’m just not cleaning. I’m not doing it. I hate cleaning.”
For him, it’s simple. He’s just not doing it. So I’d think in my head, “W.T.F? Where do you get off thinking you don’t have to clean the house? You live here. You contribute to the mess.” And then the furry would set in. I would stew about it and get angrier and angrier. The more I stewed, the more angrier I became. I’d go about cleaning the house (all by myself), banging things, occasionally throwing things out the back door (and I will admit – it does feel a bit good to toss some crap) and the end result was always the same: I loved my clean house.
So in order for me to not feel like a bitch every week, I needed a change in perspective: a clean house is important only to me. It’s important that I feel calm and order in my own home. I know I can’t force that thinking on someone so why keep trying.
My new perspective: just think what the house will be like when you’re done!
So what happens now?
Now, my family gets the ‘warning’. Here is what I typically say:
“I’m going to be cleaning the house on ________. This is your warning to pick up all your crap and get it put away. If it’s not put away it’s going in the garbage.”
As I follow through with all my comments (a.k.a threats), they all know that yes indeed, it will be thrown in the garbage. They all do their own version of ‘tidying up before the cleaning extravaganza begins. I then get my iPhone and stick in my ear buds to crank the music. And yes, I sing at the top of lungs (very off-key), I occasionally dance, I occasionally swear at the state of the kids bathroom, and I get shit done (G.S.D.)! The house gets cleaned from top to bottom and at the end, it feels great! No, let me re-phrase that: it feels
The change of perspective from being pissed off at everyone in my family to ‘ahhh’ the house looks, smells, and is so clean is SO rewarding…for me (and only me). It is the greatest feeling that our home has calm and order. And I know that if I want my home to be like that, I will need to ensure it looks like that.
That little change in perspective has me loving my husband even more instead of resenting him sitting there while I’m sweating away. It also has me hopefully being less of a ‘nag’ to the kids (although I will admit when I walk into their bathroom I can’t believe what slobs they are – which is clearly a trait they got from my hubby 😉
This month with our weekly blogs, each week I’ll be taking each area that we assist clients with and provide a couple of different perspectives to think about. I hope you get a chance to read them and weigh in.